^new^ — Ishq E Laa

There is a famous couplet by the poet Faiz Ahmed Faiz (often attributed to the Ishq e Laa tradition): "Mujh se pehli si mohabbat mere mehboob na maang" (Do not ask me for the love I gave you before, my beloved.) He is not angry. He is saying: that earlier love was needy, conditional, demanding. Now I have moved to a higher plane. Now I love you without wanting you. And that is a much harder, much lonelier, much more magnificent thing. In the age of dating apps, ghosting, and "situationships," Ishq e Laa sounds almost absurd. We have been taught that unrequited love is a pathology. Therapists call it "limerence." Friends call it "wasting your time." Social media calls it "cringe."

So here is my prayer for you: may you once in your life love someone with Ishq e Laa . Not because they deserve it. Not because it will work out. But because the act itself will transform you into someone who no longer begs for love—but radiates it. ishq e laa

The same applies to human love at its most elevated. When you love someone with Ishq e Laa , you are not loving them for their beauty (which fades), their wealth (which vanishes), or their company (which ends). You are loving the essence of them—the soul that was never yours to begin with and never will be. And in that strange, selfless space, you touch something eternal. Let us not romanticize this too easily. Ishq e Laa is excruciating. It is the path of the ashiq (the lover) who cries blood, not tears. It is waking up at 3 AM with a chest full of thorns, knowing the person you love will never know, or worse, will never care. There is a famous couplet by the poet

"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it." Now I love you without wanting you